When Others Must Confirm My Ego
In the book The Years, the French writer Annie Ernaux describes a subtle but decisive shift that took shape in the 1990s. Political struggle, once centered on collective responsibility and shared well-being, gradually gave way to a culture of individual rights—rights increasingly framed in terms of consumption and personal recognition. What mattered less was how we lived together, and more how we were seen. As Ernaux puts it, life became oriented toward the demand that “others must confirm this ego”—an ego easily offended. This shift did not happen overnight. Like most cultural transformations, it emerged through accumulation rather than rupture. But its consequences are profound. A culture that prioritizes recognition over relation slowly redirects attention from the world to the self. Attention no longer flows outward—toward others, toward shared reality—but loops back inward, seeking affirmation. The tendency described by Ernaux helps explain a paradox of contemporary life: the more attention we demand, the less attentive we become. Long before social media, Western societies were already moving toward a more individualistic, self-referential way of life. But …

