Rest easy, Deuxmoi fans. We’re not here to put Tom, Suri, or the youngest Beckham son on blast. And we’re certainly not talking about Penélope or Celia. (Frankly, we could be talking about Ted. But that’s another column.) Our topic instead is the devil’s vacation—those chthonic voyages aboard behemoths weighted with viral load and alleged human rights abuses, yet somehow still buoyant enough to float. For weeks, internet rubberneckers have been gripped by the sorry tale of the MV Hondius, an Atlantic pleasure cruise mysteriously struck by hantavirus—a rodent-borne disease that has no vaccine or cure. (You may be familiar with the ailment from its role in the death of Gene Hackman’s wife, Betsy Arakawa.) Though the travelers on that doomed ocean liner have finally been evacuated, there’s already another nautical horror story in the news. Just days ago, the CDC announced that over 100 passengers and more than a dozen crew members on a different ship, the Caribbean Princess, have been infected by norovirus—a less fatal but more disgusting illness. Epidemics such as these …