Identity Gain After Disruption | Psychology Today
Most of us respond to major disruption with the same instinct: to get back to who we were before, back to the version of ourselves that felt solid, familiar, and certain. After a divorce, the loss of a career, burnout, grief, or simply reaching a point where life no longer feels like it fits, the reflex is often the same — reclaim the old self as quickly as possible. But what if that is the wrong direction? What if the goal after hardship is not to recover the exact identity you once had, but to build a stronger and more honest one from what the experience revealed? Experts describe this process as post-traumatic growth — the positive psychological change that can emerge after adversity. To better understand this idea, I spoke with Kenny Stoddart, an executive coach and founder of IronMind Advisors, who helps high-achieving professionals navigate identity disruption and the difficult space between who they were and who they are becoming. He puts it simply: “The real work doesn’t happen in the falling apart. …








