All posts tagged: childhood development

Free-Range Kids Who Grew Up With Very Few Rules Struggle With 7 Things As Adults

Free-Range Kids Who Grew Up With Very Few Rules Struggle With 7 Things As Adults

Published by Jenni Sidey

Children who grew up with very few rules may look back on their free-range childhood as a time when they could do almost anything they wanted, but as adults, they realize they also needed guidance.  Walking to school on their own, or simply not having anything on their schedule, wasn’t necessarily a problem when they were kids, but as they grew up, certain traits they developed often began to cause issues as adults. These struggles may feel familiar to adults who remember having plenty of freedom and (very) little guidance as kids. Free-range kids who grew up with very few rules may struggle with these 7 things as adults: 1. They struggle with self-discipline Kids who had a lot of freedom as children, with little supervision, often struggle with self-discipline as adults. Permissive parenting is a parenting style in which parents may be very loving toward their children, but they set few rules or expectations. This might mean buying a toy after saying no or letting a teenager ignore their curfew without following up. The …

Kids Raised By Parents Who Made Them Work For Everything Carry 8 Advantages Into Adulthood

Kids Raised By Parents Who Made Them Work For Everything Carry 8 Advantages Into Adulthood

Published by Jenni Sidey

Kids who had to work for what they wanted can carry those lessons into adulthood. Teaching kids to value effort prepares them for life on their own.  Parents who give their kids age-appropriate responsibilities and room to face challenges, while still offering support, give them a chance to learn through experience. With that balance, kids can grow up with advantages that last long after they’ve left home. The 9 huge advantages kids raised by parents who made them work for everything have as adults: 1. They follow through even when they don’t feel like it Photoroyalty | Shutterstock.com Teaching discipline doesn’t just mean forcing kids to do chores or help at home, although those things can be beneficial in many ways. It’s about teaching kids how to look after themselves, regulate through discomfort, and think critically, even when it’s not easy. Kids raised by parents who made them work for things now have a disciplined mentality as adults. Even when it’s easier to procrastinate, stay stagnant, or avoid accountability in their own lives, these adult kids …

8 Rare Traits Of Parents Who Become Practically Besties With Their Kids In A Healthy Way

8 Rare Traits Of Parents Who Become Practically Besties With Their Kids In A Healthy Way

Published by Jenni Sidey

Our parents’ personalities play a major role in shaping our connection with them, both when we’re kids and after we’ve grown up. Many people love their parents deeply but don’t like them all that much, and they might not choose to be friends with them if they were just some random person they met along the way. Then there are others who honestly consider one or both of their parents to be extremely close friends. When a parent forms that kind of extremely close bond with their kid in a deeply healthy and natural way, it’s usually true that they also have certain rare traits that make them so likable and relatable. Parents who become practically best friends with their kids in a genuinely healthy way often possess these rare traits 1. They are accepting Todor Tsvetkov from Getty Images Signature via Canva It can feel really isolating to a child to feel like they’re not accepted. That’s a common experience for teens with their friends, so it can feel even worse when it comes …

Research Shows Kids Whose Parents Have 4 Defining Personality Traits Do Better Than Everyone Else In Life

Research Shows Kids Whose Parents Have 4 Defining Personality Traits Do Better Than Everyone Else In Life

Published by Jenni Sidey

The Big Five personality traits model has been around since at least 1929, although the specific details have evolved over time. Today, personality researchers who rely on the model say that the way we each think, behave, and feel what we feel falls somewhere along the spectrums of openness to experience, conscientiousness, extroversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism. These traits affect how we show up in all aspects of our lives, and researchers recently found that when parents have four traits in particular, their children tend to do particularly well in life compared to those whose parents lack the same traits. Some of these traits are fairly fixed, but if you really want to put in the work for the benefit of your kids, some amount of change is possible. Research shows that kids whose parents have these defining personality traits tend to do better than everyone else in life 1. Openness without neuroticism iofoto via Canva Being open doesn’t just mean accepting new perspectives or trying new things. It also refers to someone’s imagination and creativity. …

8 Lessons Kids Who Don’t Listen To Their Parents Usually Learn At Home

8 Lessons Kids Who Don’t Listen To Their Parents Usually Learn At Home

Published by Jenni Sidey

Some kids are so close to their parents that they’ll do everything they say. They trust them implicitly, so they pay attention to their rules and advice. But not all children are like this. Some can’t help but push back against their parents, no matter what they say or do. But even though they aren’t listening to their parents, they still learn lessons at home that come from their own experiences rather than following the rules. Kids learn these lessons when they don’t listen to their parents 1. There are consequences to their actions PeopleImages | Shutterstock Almost every kid gets in trouble at least once when they’re younger. They don’t know what to do, so they need their parent’s help to learn. But because they don’t listen to their parents at home, they end up understanding just how much their actions can cost. Some kids have good behavior and just make mistakes by accident. Their parents will forgive them because they know they’re not trying to do anything bad. Still, those kids won’t be …

11 Childhood Experiences That Turn Sweet Kids Into Stressed Perfectionist Adults

11 Childhood Experiences That Turn Sweet Kids Into Stressed Perfectionist Adults

Published by Jenni Sidey

There are all kinds of childhood experiences that turn good people into stressed-out adults. Many of us have experienced them first-hand, and others can’t help but notice these tendencies in partners and friends.  The childhood experiences that turned sweet kids into highly stressed, overly perfectionist adults: 1. Never feeling good enough Valery Zotev | Shutterstock Many parents teach their kids to thrive through mistakes and learning opportunities by being a “good enough” parent. However, their counterparts sabotage their kids’ development, not only trying to be perfect themselves, but also holding their kids to unrealistic expectations. These were the kids who were excited to share that they got an A on a test, only to be asked why they didn’t get extra credit. They were the kids who went above and beyond playing a sport, only to be critiqued in the car on the way home. They always felt like no matter how hard they worked or how much heart they put into their actions, they were less than what their parents wanted. As adults, they’re …

60s & 70s Parents Weren’t Perfect, But These 9 ‘Tough Love’ Habits Raised More Resilient Kids

60s & 70s Parents Weren’t Perfect, But These 9 ‘Tough Love’ Habits Raised More Resilient Kids

Published by Jenni Sidey

Constant discipline and punishment can harm mental toughness in children, but a dash of tough love might be exactly what all kids need. According to therapist Dr. Nicole McGuffin, a mix of structure and nurturing, as well as tough love, are exactly how great parents raise great kids. While 60s and 70s parents weren’t perfect by any means, their tough love habits raised more resilient kids. Compared to the overly coddling, overbearing parents and entitled kids of today, they figured out how to challenge their kids for the sake of growth. 60s and 70s parents weren’t perfect, but these 9 ‘tough love’ habits raised more resilient kids 1. Making kids play outside all day PeopleImages | Shutterstock Facing boredom is an important practice for kids growing up, not only to offer emotional regulation skills, but also to boost creativity and critical thinking, as well as a general sense of self. The “just go outside” mentality might have been annoying for kids who wanted to do nothing inside or play with toys, but it offered them …

Being Raised In The 60s & 70s Made People Better Humans In 10 Ways Kids Today Will Never Understand

Being Raised In The 60s & 70s Made People Better Humans In 10 Ways Kids Today Will Never Understand

Published by Jenni Sidey

As social norms and society change, so too do parenting standards and expectations, so it’s not surprising that many parenting styles, virtues, behaviors, and priorities from the 60s and 70s have shifted for modern parents. Parents now care about different things as they manage different struggles, changing the way they approach raising kids. From giving kids the opportunity to engage in healthy, unstructured play to letting them solve conflicts with friends on their own time, being raised in the 60s and 70s made people better humans in certain ways that kids today will never understand. While modern kids may be more digitally savvy and emotionally self-aware, old-school behaviors and values are sabotaging traits like patience and empathy. Being raised in the 60s and 70s made people better humans in 10 ways kids today will never understand 1. They learned the art of patience PeopleImages | Shutterstock.com Delayed gratification and the art of waiting, especially for young kids at impressionable stages, can often bolster positive outcomes like patience later in life. They’re not taught to feel entitled to …

Adults Who Were Singled Out & Felt Unwanted As A Child Often Develop These 11 Destructive Habits

Adults Who Were Singled Out & Felt Unwanted As A Child Often Develop These 11 Destructive Habits

Published by Jenni Sidey

People develop much of their self-worth based on the messages they received in their formative years, which is why adults who were singled out or felt unwanted as children can develop destructive habits. If you were treated with kindness and acceptance, you probably learned to value yourself and believe in your abilities. If not, the opposite can be true.   Our emotional well-being is impacted by our sense of belonging. Fortunately, there are ways to change these patterns once we recognize them.  Adults who were singled out & felt unwanted as a child often develop these 11 destructive habits 1. They avoid rejection Pheelings media | Shutterstock As human beings, we’re inherently social creatures, which means we need connection with other people to survive and thrive. If you were excluded as by other kids in school, it likely lowered your self-esteem and affected the way you form attachments in adulthood. A 2017 study titled “Causes and Consequences of Social Exclusion and Peer Rejection Among Children and Adolescents” noted that exclusion isn’t always intended to cause …

11 Things Kids In The 1970s Used To Do That Parents Today Don’t Allow Anymore

11 Things Kids In The 1970s Used To Do That Parents Today Don’t Allow Anymore

Published by Jenni Sidey

Being a kid in the 1970s was a period of freedom. They played outside without parental supervision and walked to school with all their friends, just a few of the many things kids in the 1970s used to do that parents today don’t allow anymore. They didn’t have a parent hovering over their shoulder, solving all their problems or removing discomfort from their lives, so it’s not a surprise that Gen Xers are resilient and independent adults. Compared to kids today, coddled by gentle and overbearing parents, they have a level of autonomy that we’re quickly losing. Taking accountability for their own lives and solving problems on their own might feel like “bare minimum” things, but kids today struggle to do them well. Here are 11 things kids in the 1970s used to do that parents today don’t allow anymore 1. Riding bicycles without helmets Evgeny Atamanenko | Shutterstock.com Not only were kids in the 70s riding around town on bicycles without helmets, but they were doing so without parental supervision. Two things that parents …